The locals' guide to...Tenerife
Tenerife may attract more Brits than a two-for-one deal at Wetherspoons, but it has the best winter sun in Europe and you can still find plenty of quiet spots on its 350km coastline... And for more information you can purchase a Lonely Planet Spain guide.
How do I get away from large tour groups wearing matching caps?
Tenerife is the size of Warwickshire, yet it has to accommodate over 10 million tourists a year. One way to avoid this merry rabble on cheap holidays in Tenerife - and see the entire island at the same time - is to hike the 3,700 metres up Pico del Teide, a volcano and the highest peak on Spanish soil. It's around five hours walk from Montana Blanca. Lazy bones can take the cable car to 3,555 metres. And don't worry too much about lava. The last eruption was in 1909.
Where do the locals party?
There's no shortage of bars and restaurants near the cheap Tenerife hotels of the south, and fans of Euro pop will be dancing all night. Savvy locals, however, party in the capital Santa Cruz de Tenerife and the university town of La Laguna, just to the west of it. Nightlife in the former is concentrated around Plaza Iglesia, while in La Laguna all the nocturnal action (and there's lots of it) takes place in El Cuadrilatero, in the university district.
Restaurants without an 'all-you-can-eat tourist buffet'?
Egg 'n' chips are par for the course (main course, dessert, whatever) in the south for those on Tenerife package holidays, but for altogether more genuine Tenerife restaurants head to the capital to joints such as Mesón Chejota, Taberna del Cortijo, Primi and Solana.
The locals' absolutely secret number one tip :
If you plan to take the cable car up the Pico del Teide and you have a permit for the final 200m push to the summit, make sure you arrive early. The queues for the cable car are often lengthy and the authorities are strict about when you can hike from the top station to the summit.
A quick guide to where the locals hang out
The beach: El Médano is 2km long and favoured by windsurfers. Space for everyone.
The observatory: Forget the cinema. Better than any movie is the Teide Astronomic Observatory near El Portillo. Make an appointment and gaze at the stars.
The shops : Every Sunday morning there's a flea market at Rastro in Santa Cruz. Usual cheese, but good fun.
The trip: For a bit of history head up to La Laguna (20 minutes by bus from the capital) and visit the beautiful old town - now a UNESCO World Heritage Site.
The cocktail : Sip a Mistela (a potent mix which combines wine, sugar, rum and occasionally honey) at El Lagar de La Noria on Calle Antonio Domínguez Alfonso.
The view: You can't beat the vista from the top of Pico del Teide. It's the highest mountain on Spanish soil.
The museum: At the Museo Militar de Almeyda you can see the famous cannon called El Tigre which supposedly blew off Lord Nelson's arm when he attacked Santa Cruz in 1797.
The place for people watching: Laugh at your fellow drunken tourists while you dine in style on the second floor terrace at El Faro in Playa de las Américas.
Why not try? Tenerife island tour
Details:
Pico del Teide National Park Office, Calle Emilio Calzadilla 5, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 290129, www.mma.es; Mesón Chejota, Calle Doctor Allart 15, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 290 291; La Taberna del Cortijo, Avenida La Salle 25, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 213309; Primi, Avenida de la Constitución s/n, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 209425, www.primi.es; Solana, Calle Pérez de Rozas 15, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 243780; Teide Astronomic Observatory - Instituto de Astrofísica de Canarias, Calle Vía Láctea, La Laguna, +34 922 605207, www.iac.es; Rastro Santa Cruz flea market, Avenida José Manuel Guimerá, Santa Cruz de Tenerife; El Lagar de La Noria, Calle Antonio Domínguez Alfonso 37, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 247815, www.bulantenerife.com/ellagar.html; Museo Histórico Militar de Canarias, Calle San Isidro 2, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 845734; El Faro, Parque Santiago V, Playa de las Américas, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, +34 922 753827, www.feixoada.com/faro/index.html; Coral Beach Aparthotel, Calle Noelia Afonso 10, Alona, Playa de las Américas;
Can I drink the water?
The eight essential questions you'll need answering
Which local animal is likely to hospitalise me?
Watch out for the presa canario guard dogs. With stocky frames and huge heads, these are Tenerife versions of the pit bull terrier, and they have tempers to match.
Which native liquor will make me think I am attractive?
The Tacoronte-Acentejo red wine is the first wine from the Canary Islands to earn a Spanish appellation. Stick with this brand, it beats its cheaper rivals.
How can I avoid a beating by the local hard nuts?
Don't laugh at the fancy dress nuns, priests and drag queens at Santa Cruz de Tenerife's annual carnival in February.
Will I get lost?
Only if you fall asleep on your lilo and drift out to sea. Next stop Africa.
Will I find myself?
The views from Pico del Teide over to the other Canary Islands is breathtaking - you could easily discover your spiritual side from up here.
Should I take an umbrella?
June, July and August are completely rain-free, but you may occasionally need a brolley during the winter months.
What should I order in a restaurant to impress the locals?
You can get tapas in Spain, so opt for something more adventurous such as conejo en salmorejo (marinated rabbit).
Can I drink the water?
In coastal areas tap water is desalinated and tastes awful. It won't make you sick, but the bottled variety tastes a lot nicer.
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